The Great Balsamic Glaze Argument of 2014

FFF (me): So this is what Balsamic Glaze is” *Shows Mr40 the balsamic glaze I bought in Tesco that’s in the fridge door*

Mr40: I know what Balsamic Glaze is. I’m not stupid.

FFF: I didn’t realise because you bought this *picks up balsamic dressing*

Mr40: Yes I know *getting angry* but Sainsbury’s don’t sell Balsamic Glaze.

FFF: Well they do…Tesco have about 5 different sorts so I imagine Sainsbury’s have a big selection too.

Mr40: Look I looked for Balsamic Glaze. They don’t sell it. I got you the next best thing.

FFF: Yes, and it’s lovely and I’ve used it, but I just thought I’d show you what it looked like so you know next time…..

Mr40: I KNOW WHAT BALSAMIC GLAZE IS.  *starts looking more in the fridge* I think I did actually buy some.

FFF: The old Balsamic glaze was 3 years old I’ve chucked it.

Mr40: NO I BOUGHT SOME. I THOUGHT I DID. Anyway, I couldn’t find any (!) so I got that one.

FFF: (backing off).Ok.  *Sits down to eat half a pizza and some salad. With Balsamic Glaze*

Mr40: Well, What do you think I do at the supermarket.  Eh? Eh?

FFF: *Sits in silence*.

We did discuss it again.  He came back from his storming upstairs to ask why I thought he was stupid.  I got the dressing out the fridge again and started talking and he cut me off (again).  I did eventually say:

FFF: When you bought this dressing, you didn’t say anything about it *Mr40 attempts to interuppt again* so there was a chance you either just couldn’t find it OR that you didn’t know what Balsamic Glaze was.  I just thought I’d show you.

Mr40: *silence*

FFF: I wasn’t expecting the bloody great balsamic Glaze argument of 2014.

The offending bottle of Balsamic Glaze

The offending bottle of Balsamic Glaze

The Makeup Bag of a 40 Year Old

I quite like makeup.  I always have.  Unfortunately I was so expert (!) at putting it on that throughout my life people didn’t think I wore any.  Except, obviously, when I went out and layered on the eyeliner and eyeshadow.  I now think it’s quite a skill to manage to wear makeup, but not look like you are wearing any, so I’m curious to what other people do now.

I though I’d share with you what is in my makeup bag.  This is it, sitting inside a much bigger makeup bag (which contains aforementioned “going out” paraphernalia) and this smaller bag contains my everyday makeup (give or take the odd item).

my make up bagI keep it in the top drawer of a tallboy in my dressing room (yes, I have one of them, not for much longer sadly).  I use a lit up Revlon mirror set to “daylight” to apply it in the morning.

my makeup bagSo what is inside the makeup bag, I hear you cry, well here is was THIS 42 year old is currently wearing on her face.

After applying my Clarins Blue Orchid oil and then a moisturiser (currently Boots Protect and Perfect Day cream) I then apply the following:

Clarins BB Cream – this is an absolute gem. The amount of people who mention how well I am or comment on photos of how dewy or illuminated I am in it are huge.  It creates a gorgeous glow.

Laura Mercier camouflage secret camouflage concealer.  I have had this for ages (yes, I know they are supposed to have a shelf life, but I tend to ignore that) and I only dragged it out again last year after the pfaff of the Bobby Brown concealer.  I now love this product. You can mix it as you see fit but I generally use the lighter shade under my eyes and the darker shade to hide the broken veins (lovely) around my nose and the odd chin spot. I use the little brush which is an eco brush from Boots.

I then apply mascara. I’ve been through all sorts in my lifetime but I find Maybelline are consistently brilliant and although it’s now tricky to find their original mascara, I use their Masterpiece one in Black.

My blusher is currently the Bobby Brown one I got last February, but as you can see I’m scraping the bottom of the barrel with it.  I use the big brush to apply it that I’ve had for about 15 years.  The one underneath is my new Clarins blush in a very similar Coral colour.  I’ve only swapped allegiance because my new town doesn’t have a Bobby Brown, but I do really rate this creme blusher. I never used a creme (or cream?) one before but once I just got on and did it, I think it’s a much nicer finish.  As you get older, anything that looks moisturised and not matte is a good thing.

Just to the right of that is my Bobby Brown creme eyeshadow in Lavender.  I’d never have chosen it myself (too old lady?) but it was picked during my makeover in February and it’s actually really nice on and provides the tiniest shade of colour. I don’t wear this to work, but a trip to visit my dad or a bbq it’s a nice understated added extra.

An eyeliner has snuck in there.  I can’t remember the brand, but they are usually a pen eyeliner of some sort, in black and I only ever put it on when I’m out for the evening at a party or big get together.  I can’t believe I used to use liquid eyeliner EVERY day through out my teens and twenties.  As I’ve got older I find it’s a bit too heavy during the day.

The tweezers?  Well I love these ones as they have flattened, ridged ends and never fail to grab.  I use these beauties on my eyebrows and sadly, my chin hair.  I’d have a full beard by now if it wasn’t for them.

So there you have it.  Anything there you fancy?  Anything you would add?  What’s in your makeup bag?

 

 

 

 

I’ve Been Loved A Lot

This is what I used to look like. Fluffy and soft. Full bodied.  I used to sit up right without slumping.  I looked amazing.

toy dog before

 I’ve been living with The Monster now for nearly 4 years and this is what I now look like.

toy dog after

My fur is straw like, a few too many cuddles, being flung about, dropped on pavements or grass, washed several times a year because I was a bit smelly or had been sicked on (I’ve always been there in his hour of need).  I’ve been loved a lot.

My paws are a bit flatter because they’ve been sucked quite a lot in moments of anxiety, in thoughtful contemplation or when things have been a little tricky.  I’ve been loved a lot.

close up of sleepy dog

My face is squished thin a bit. I’ve spent a lot of time pressed into a toddler bed with an arm around my head. I’ve been loved a lot.

My body has become a bit dumpier, the stuffing has dropped down from being squeezed too many times.  I’ve been loved a lot.

I’m not as beautiful as I once was but…..

I’ve been loved a lot.

Sleepy Dog before and after

* This post was inspired by me finding my stashed supply of Sleepy Dog when one of TM’s dog’s went missing.  When he started sleeping with it I had to get another 2 for emergency and ended up spending a fortune locating them in Australia.  Over the years he has got used to having 2 at his disposal so by losing one, I finally had to get the last one “off the bench”.

Was I Like Her?

Me :  “Okay …4 times 5.  Let’s count up in 5’s using the blocks.  Five….”

Her : “Ummmm. 10……….and ummmmm” *sticks finger in her mouth and stares at ceiling.

Me : “Come on, we’ve just counted up when we did 6 times 5.  It’s 15.   Let’s do it again”

Her: “5, ummmmm, 10, ummmmmm, 15…………………………………………………………*shouts* 34″

Me: “come on, we’ve just done it, you know it’s not 34″

Her: *baby voice* yes it is.

Me:  “Right, lets take you to bed I can’t do this anymore”

Her: *starts crying* “but I neeeed to do my homework”.

This isn’t isolated.  She mucks about, she doesn’t concentrate, she purposely says the wrong answer, claims she doesn’t know things she has just said.

To be honest, I’m starting to see something familiar going on and I can’t but wonder whether  this familiarity harks back to the later 70’s and early 80’s when I was attempting to grasp the basics with maths and english.

I have no firm memories but sometimes I feel like I’m talking to my younger self.

So bloody frustrating.

How do you stop yourself from getting annoyed?

I know she’s capable.  I know she’s like me, above average capability but lacking confidence, concentration and interest.

Get me on a good day, I am cheerfully persistent and kind and try different things to engage her, but get me on a bad day and I really struggle with not getting very very cross.

Is this it for ever more?   Am I going to be punished for my own lack of enthusiasm for learning by experiencing the difficulty of myself through my daughter?

*sigh*

 

 

No more Skinny Minny

It’s happened.  I should have seen it coming.  I’ve seen it creeping up since I was 36 but I just didn’t believe it.

How can I go from being underweight for nearly 30 years to actually having a bad BMI?

From being called some pretty bad names for being so incredibly skinny in high school, to being unable to fit in post pregnancy jeans.  I’m tall, I was never been an 8 by the way.  I’m not being melodramatic.

The jean thing was my tipping point.  It wasn’t just the top of them (my tummy does stick out more than my boobs), it was the thighs as well. I can’t deny it anymore. I watched my mother (one of the skinniest teenagers I’ve ever seen — she used to try to be photographed squishing her thigh on something so she looked bigger FGS) who was a size smaller than me become a 16.  16 is a fine size by the way, if you are built to be a size 16, if you’ve always been a size 16.  It wasn’t my mum’s size and it isn’t mine.  I can’t start sliding down that slope.

So this morning I asked what people do.  Those people who diet. I should have seen it coming. I am no longer that super eater, super-metaboliser woman. My metabolism is now hand cranked, it aint super anymore.scales

I’ve downloaded myfitnesspal and started recording my eating habits and exercise.  I’ve only done one day and it’s been quite an eye opener.

The critical thing for me was to find a way to diet without my children knowing. I don’t want to talk about it, I don’t want to eat differently and I don’t want to suggest that I need to diet because of society constraints.

The truth is, I’m tired and unfit and my escalating weight is merely a symptom of all of that. I need to focus on what I’m putting in my body and get my act together.  If I can lose some weight and change my lifestyle I can take my foot off the pedal every so often and practice what I currently preach my daughter, everything in moderation.

Wish me luck.