Why Parenting is a lot like Being a Secret Agent

I’m thinking of applying to be a Secret Agent. I really do think I’ve got the necessary skills.

Highly Honed Hearing

  • I can hear a dummy drop whilst still asleep…. and by the sound of it, pinpoint exactly where to fish about for it in the dark
  • I can perceive the tiniest change of tone in my 6 year old’s voice and locate a suitable phrase within seconds to head off any drama.

Lightning speed

  • I can get a tea towel or other absorbent item in front of my child seconds before they are sick, I’m that fast!
  • I am able to get my hand under a falling glass when it is just millimetres from the ground.

Slight of hand/conjurer

  • I have mastered the task of presenting a banana or snack bar that HAD been broken as if it had NEVER been broken.  Taa Daa.
  • The ability to remove toys from the house by means of what I call “The Shawshank” method.

Being Multilingual

  • As proficient as speaking Octonauts as I am at speaking Barbie
  • Able to have a normal English adult conversation about house prices on one side of the dinner table whilst continuing a toddler angled one on the other related to peas, broccoli and the negotiation of chocolate buttons.

Drinking a dry Martini

  • Well, actually no.   Just hand me a glass of Rosé.  . Quickly!
Secret Agent T40YO

Secret Agent T40YO

As always I am grateful for having an audience at all that regularly read my blog and give me such lovely feedback but it’s always nice to get further recognition.  If you enjoy reading my blog and fancy nominating me for a MAD award 2014 (in the category of Most Entertaining Blog), then you can do so here www.the-mads.com/awards/ If you don’t….I still love you all. X



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