When He Said the Wrong Thing

I do often feel a teeny bit sorry for my husband.  Sometimes.  He often says something that riles me, that results in an argument and afterwards, if I really thought about it, the opposite thing he could have said, probably would have riled me as well. He was in a bit of a lose/lose situation.  In the interest of open, honest conversation, I have told him that. Just so he knows, I know.

HOWEVER….I do worry about where his head is at, when he pipes up with some real beauties, thank quite frankly are very very brave, but could only end in tears.

Like, last night.  We are both tired. He’s had a full day rehearsal on his secret BBC project, then spent the evening lugging furniture around in preparation for our new carpet fitting.  I’m tired, because, well because I always am.  Light off, head on pillow and he says “We really do have a lot of crap in this house. We need to sort it out”.

*Deep Breathes”.  I don’t know about you, but in my house, I’m the sorter.  I’m the one that buys new kids clothes, packs away old clothes, sorts through old clothes and, when I’m in the right “sorting” mood, I will sort through them and send some off to friends, some to charity and  some to the bin.  The same with toys and furniture.  Hubby is not the least bit interested in doing this.  He’s never done it. I have NEVER seen him declutter.  Once every few years he grabs a load of his own clothes and takes them to charity, but that’s it.  He has no interest in anyone elses.

So you can imagine how well that comment went down.  It came from a good place. He was merely commenting on what is actually the truth, but I’m a doer not a talker and I’d just prefer it if he said “We have such a lot of stuff and I know between us we have no time to sort it so I’m going to spend a few days sorting stuff into piles and if you could give them the once over we can get rid of a load of crap upstairs”.  That would have been more useful wouldn’t it.charitybags

Unfortunately he didn’t say that. He made a comment about something he has never ever sorted and quite frankly he got it with both barrels.  Nothing like having the grump with each other as you fall asleep.

Two weeks ago, he did a similar thing.  What was more frustrating was that after the argument ensued, he said he’d been quite worried about saying something but decided to say something which was the STUPIDIEST decision.

He had gone out with the kids for the afternoon so I could have a bit of down time with a small hangover.  In that time I had cleaned a bathroom and done 3 loads of washing.  I did get a 2 hour nap in as well, but that was the point of me staying at home.  I don’t tend to blow my own trumpet when I do everyday, normal, family maintenance jobs like this, so when he got back and started to get the bath ready for the kids, he was clearly in a grump. I could see it. I didn’t ask and then he couldn’t help himself.  “You could have emptied the dishwasher while I was out”.   ARGGHHHHH.

Needless to say, the poor bugger got an earful from me.

Anyone else got a better award for the “Stupidiest thing to say to a Spouse”?

 

I’ve linked this back to Mummy Barrow’s Ranty Friday. Click on the pic below if you fancy reading more rants.

MummyBarrow

18 thoughts on “When He Said the Wrong Thing

  1. Michelle

    He says daft things all the time. But just daft. My favourite of all time is “you look beautiful, in a Michelle sort of way”. To me that said, by your standards you look quite nice. Normal standards, meh, not soo good. :-)

    Reply
  2. Sophie Prescott

    I love your post, you sound just like me!

    The most recent award for the “Stupidiest thing to say to a Spouse” going to my husband was when he told me the other day that I was lazy! Your kidding right?! Apparently the reason I am lazy is because I used a knife to cut the strawberries up instead of the official strawberry cutter we have in the drawer! Give me a break I do not stop around my house whether it’s doing the washing, sorting out the kids hair, clothes, teeth, school runs, cooking all the meals, cleaning the house and working part time (I’m sure there’s more)! Ahhh that feels better Thank You! Lol!

    Reply
    1. Bella Post author

      I aim to please. Glad you were able to vent! A strawberry cutter? Really. Surely a knife is easier to grab and just as quick.

      Reply
  3. Karen

    My usually lovely husband, once said to me, in all seriousness, when I was 6 months post pregnancy, and despairing of ever fitting into my old clothes… “Why don’t you just buy some more pregnancy clothes then?” He wondered why I threw a tantrum and stomped off!
    I think sometimes men definitely don’t engage brain before speaking!

    Reply
  4. Kara

    My husband does this ALL the time. He works 13 hour days and as soon as he gets in he moans over the stupidist thing…….The one toy on the floor that I have missed or the washing that is sorted on the sofa that I haven’t put away yet because I’ve only just done it and don’t want to disturb the children that have just fallen asleep. AND he always does the “well you’re at home ALL day and I’ve been at work” as if to make out I have had an easy day!

    Reply
  5. the Boss @and1makes4

    I had a baby 4 months ago. I was showing spaghetting into the jar forcefully. Husband somes up behind me, gives me a hug, grabs my baby tummy and says “that’s a fair squeeze”. I looked at him (on of those looks), he took a few minutes but everntually it registered. He’s an idiot.

    Reply
  6. Sharon

    My OH said whilst describing a pregnant colleague at work “It’s funny how some women just get a big bump and nothing else and others get big all over, like you are”. Cue hormonal rant (which are always the best ones!).

    Reply
  7. Mummy Barrow

    oh god I hear you.

    We stayed in a hotel last night. My alarm went off and Mr B said “if you jump in the bathroom now you should be able to get enough hot water for a bath before anybody else is up”.

    What I heard was “Get out of bed now and don’t enjoy a lie in”

    What I would like to have heard was “I am awake so I am going to put the kettle on and make you a nice cup of tea while I RUN you a bath”.

    Hell will freeze over first.

    Reply

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