Your daughter was withdrawn at the birthday party.
You called her stubborn. She looked overwhelmed and shy.
You stayed for over an hour to settle her, then left. It took me 20 minutes to convince her to come to the birthday tea table.
40 minutes later you were back. Chatting to me. Stinking of alcohol. Talking whilst I was trying to enjoy my daughter’s party.
I went to deal with a child so I can could get out of the conversation.
I did judge you.
I judged you on your ability to know what your daughter was feeling
I judged you on why your daughter was behaving like that. Was there an issue at home?
I judged you on going to the pub during the party.
I judged you for chatting to me when I needed to be part of the party.
I feel bad because that judging was based on that hour long obvservation, but I have little else to go on.
So when you invite my daughter (along with one other girl) to your house after school for a small birthday party, I say no. A car ride away (are you driving?) to a house I’ve never been to. To a home I have no idea about.
But I have manners
I said we were busy as family was visiting, but that we were pleased you had thought of us.
What else could I do?